Focus on Who You’re Being

One of things we have really backwards in personal development is the way in which goals, dreams and desires are approached. As a result people make far less progress than they are capable of and eventually get frustrated and stop trying.

Today I want to talk about a simple shift in approach that will dramatically increase the likelihood you accomplish your goals and  and realize your dreams.

Traditional Thinking

  • Do: The first thing we’re told to do is to take action. I’m all for taking action, but if you’re doing it from a very negative mindset the effectiveness of it will be subpar at best. This is the default way in which most people approach taking action in their lives and for the most part this can turn into a personal development hamster wheel.
  • Have: If we do what we need to do, we tend to think that we’ll have whatever we think we’re going to get. Occasionally it does work, but it’s only if you’re in that select few who manage to make it off the the hamster wheel of continuous action. By the time you actually have what you were trying to get you’re completely exhausted by the pursuit of it.
  • Be: We have a tendency to think that once we do what we need to do, we’ll have what we wanted and we’ll be how we wanted t be. To clarify with an example, we save the money for a new car, we buy it and we’re now satisfied, fulfilled or happy.

The problem with this approach to living life is that everything is dependent on the external circumstances of your life. If those circumstances don’t line up or go according to plan your way of being is negatively affected and your next actions will align accordingly.

A More Powerful Approach

  • Be: As I said the title of the article indicated don’t worry about what you’re doing and instead focus on who you’re being. This is something you have control over. You can choose to be happy, fulfilled, or anything else you want to be. You can choose to be the type of person you want to be.
  • Do: The interesting thing about starting with being the person you want to be is that your actions will align accordingly. Thus you’ll be taking all your actions from a much more empowering place. You might refer to this as what is called inspired action. I’ll give you a personal example. At the moment I’m unemployed and for the last few weeks I was being a guy who is unemployed again, living at home again, and every other lousy thing I could pile upon my mountain of self pity. A friend called my attention to the person I was being and suddenly I asked myself “if I was being a guy who was successful already how would I see this situation?.” Instantly I started to see opportunity in my presentation situation and all of my actions since have aligned accordingly.
  • Have: The interesting thing is that with this approach to things we not only see the world through a much more powerful lens, we still get to have the things we want. Not only is it more effective, but it’s much more fulfilling because we’re not so tied to the external circumstances of our lives in order to be fulfilled.

Determine the person you wan to be for the next 30 days and just be it. Take note of your actions that you take and the results they generate. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.

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